A few weeks into the new year, I reflect as we still remain deep with remnants of the last.
My wish was to leave you with a message of connection if some are feeling unsteady from the year behind.
I have a memory from when I made my way to a village called Kookal, in the mountains of Tamil Nadu, India. The sun kissed my faced and I awoke one morning knowing it was time I tried to create a peaceful finale with travelling. Making endings was hard. I always found when one says “finale”, I would naturally gravitate toward a dramatic ending. I taught myself to choose a peaceful lullaby, and find closure that way.
I have the same feeling now as we move into a new year. Yet, I have the same overwhelm of fatigue that blanketed my body. Just as the sun began rising, so will this new year and as any new day did, I did not wish to waste any more moments lost in my ‘Dara translation’, knowing this can be an irreversible step once deep in the vortex.
I missed connection. I missed my roots. With my eyes closing, I was shown all those I met and still able to see the places I had been in the near two years I had been on my adventures. I connected with so many, both local and many who were not. As I tiptoed away from campsite and took myself to the tree stump thinking I was going to have a magnificent meditation, I was in for a better surprise.
With no music; an unusual space for me to be in, I sat still. My thoughts began to quieten. Sounds around me were louder, the sharpness of the bird song became clearer and so did the chatter amongst them. I could hear each branch and the leaves between them. It was in this moment that I understood the meaning that with every ending there will always be a chapter thereafter.
It was time for a new chapter. A chapter only I could trust to feel safe in. A chapter only I could nest and make my own.
There will always be an unsavoury feeling as I leave any familiar pace of life, especially after being within it for long periods of time. Stepping into any unknown chapter can trigger me.
I remembered how brave I was.
The intrinsic cycle of life is all about new chapters. We learn how to adapt. My eyes fluttered open with gooey remains, and I looked out knowing I am a part of it. I perched, I watched the morning mist encase me as I began to see Mother Nature do her thing. The Eucalyptus trees were deep in my lungs as I began to slow my breathing down, as the cool air and it’s freshness overwhelmed me in the high mountains.
I remembered again why watching the seduction of it’s slow, moving pace, was so imperative. It put me into a meditative hypnosis, which was why I choose the mornings to breathe.
I could always be a part of the cycle because it was my choice. To choose the next chapter to nurture me. It felt good for me to watch the mist flow through each gap of the branches.
Just as it felt good for me to remember the beauty of the textures imprinted within the mountain peaks and how each texture were reflected in the birds that flowed around me.
The hills curved and rolled and the winds of change came over me, just as this new year will bring to us all.
Change is positive.
Change can also surface fear.
Remembering the one moment in our lives we overcame fear, befriends it. We take fear by the hand and say “it is safe”.
Just as we are.
If we can, may we remember to look to nature, as it ground us in these moments of change.